From the Land of Blah

I find myself in the midst of blah. I dislike the teaching style of both my professors. They are unorganized. In the arena of academia, I cannot write without structure. I am slowly becoming uninterested and it’s only week 3. I honestly do not know how I am going to become motivated enough to take an interest in the subject matter. I started on this journey to help improve my writing skills. This is NOT helping me at all. I feel like I have wasted my money. I do not like to waste money. I am frustrated. The whole situation is making me one unhappy crabapple. I am becoming cynical in addition to my already wonderful sarcastic personality. This is NOT helping me at all. My lover, MUSIC, cannot seem to pull me out of this. Have you ever been listening to a song and then start to berate the artist for the lyrics? I did that today. My coworker told me I needed to treat myself. She doesn’t know it but for the last two weekends I’ve pampered myself with a pedicure and a spa visit. Even that was with a hard push from a good friend. What in the world is going on with me? I want this degree so bad I can taste it and yet today I sit here wondering if I set myself of for failure. What is this I am feeling? Is it more than just frustration? I feel like I am sitting under the biggest funk cloud ever. Why now? What am I going to do about it? I cannot answer that question right now. *sighs*