The days are long and the night are even longer. It seems as though darkest and single are the prelude to my peculiar ponderances. Often times my mind draws a definite blank and then I have to start from scratch. I look out of the window at night up into the sky and I wonder can anybody see me from way up there. If they can I wonder what they actually think. I know I say life is short and you have to live for today but I wish I had some clue as to how things are suppose to go. Like a magic 8 ball so I could shake it and know all the answers to any question I had. I mean I hear music and the messages in the lyrics and wonder at what point does that line pop into the writer’s head and they think “THIS IS THE ONE“. When my mind wanders I wonder why it is I can not simply jot down what it is I am thinking and turn it into something powerful. I wonder why it is all this time I’ve never done anything besides copyright my poetry (all 500 + poems) or write my stories but never finish them. Why is it that at times my mind loses interest in the words I write? Dayum right now what I could use is some inspiration. I thought I had some but it flew away like the wind. Like a bird it caught flight and was whisked away into a whole other dimension. Why is it things never work out the way you planned? I just want to be passionate with the one soul in my life who can connect with me completely and freely of their own heart my mind body and soul. At the rate I’m going I wonder if that person really exists. Not the perfect person just that one piece to fit my puzzle. Why is it in the quiet of a single moment I cry for apparent reason at all? That’s probably why I try not to be idle but today just seems to be one of those days. It’s gotta get better than this.